My personal cure-all

November 26, 2011

We all know there’s no such thing as a cure-all.  If there were, we’d all know about it and be getting it.  Still, I’d like to think that everyone has something that will make them feel at least a little bit better.  It might be a certain movie, a piece of artwork, or a friend.  For me, it’s dogs.

I’m not suggesting that dogs cure me.  That would be ridiculous.  But if I feel good, dogs make me happier.  If I feel bad, they make me feel a little less bad.  This has been a tough week, but spending the evening with a sweet dog who I love, plus a new puppy, made me feel so much better.  No, I’m not completely well, but I’m better than I was before seeing the dogs, and I’m certain that I’m better than I would have been if they weren’t there.

There’s one dog in particular who is amazing.  He’s very intuitive.  When someone is ill, he comforts them.  My parents are very lucky to have him.  When I have been at their house while ill, he will stay by my side.  He’s often a lap dog, but eventually he wants to play.  When I feel sick, though, he just curls up by my side, his little furry body radiating warmth and love, and I start to feel better.  He just stays there until I start to improve.  There are studies that say petting a dog or a cat can lower a person’s blood pressure.  I don’t need to read a study.  I feel it every time he jumps into my lap.

So yes, I am the absurd 30-something who will stop strangers on the street and ask to pet their dog.  But why not?  It makes me feel better, it makes me happy, the dogs love the attention, and the owners love hearing strangers say how sweet their dog is.  Everyone wins.  We all need something that makes us feel better, and for me it comes in a furry form.  I can’t have a dog of my own (I’m not well enough to care for it) but I’ll spend time with others’ dogs whenever I can.  They are amazing animals.

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1 Comment | Medication, Raves, Support | Permalink
Posted by chronicrants

Resting vs. Relaxing

November 19, 2011

I’ve been resting a lot lately.  I guess I’ve been resting a lot for a few years now, but it seems like I’ve needed it more in the last year or so.

Since I rest a lot, I want to be “active” whenever I feel up to it.  Now, “active” doesn’t necessarily mean going for a jog or running errands.  Sometimes that means writing this blog or doing the dishes.  Still, it always means doing something, and always doing something can be mentally tiring.

Last night I realized that I’d done all of the most important things on my to do list.  I’d even done my physical therapy (which is more unusual than I’d like to admit.)  I felt like I should do something else, but then it hit me: I should relax! 

Resting is not the same as relaxing.  I wish it were, but it’s just not.  Maybe both would involve watching tv, but the first happens when I feel lousy and I’m just trying to feel a bit better, while the second happens when I already feel ok and just want to feel more relaxed.  Think about it: how often do you watch tv or read a book not because you need to rest physically or mentally, but just because you want to sit back and enjoy the activity?

After a rocky start, my rare foray into relaxation went very well.  I decided to watch a movie, and even though the disc turned out to be scratched and will have to go back to Netflix, I found a great old 1940s movies on my dvr.  I love old movies, so this was a real treat.  I made some popcorn, and spent two great hours snacking, watching a funny movie, and knitting.  Now that’s  how to relax!

Relaxation is an important part of self-care.  How do you relax?  What will you do for yourself this week?

If any of this sounds familiar, if you can relate, please share it on Facebook and/or Twitter.  This blog is new, and it would be great to share it.

Leave a Comment » | Expectations, Raves, Symptoms, Thoughtfulness | Permalink
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Carnivaling about gratitude

November 15, 2011

I’m excited to be part of Chronic Babe‘s blog carnival today!  This week’s carnival is about gratitude.

Gratitude is a tricky thing.  Even if you have it one day, you may not have it the next.  There are many things I am be grateful for.  Most of these are somewhat obvious: family, friends, having a decent apartment and enough food.  The reason I wrote the post on appreciating my body is because, despite all of its flaws, it still offers me quite a lot, and I don’t want to take that for granted.  I hope you can find a way to feel the same way about your body.

Leave a Comment » | Expectations, Limitations, Milestones, Raves | Permalink
Posted by chronicrants

The community of a support group

November 11, 2011

After 20 years of symptoms, today I went to my first support group.

There are a lot of reasons I never went to a support group before today.  When I was a kid and the symptoms started, no one suggested it.  Later, I didn’t know where to look (this was in the olden days, before Google.)  After a while it was more that I was stubborn and scared.  I’m still not entirely sure what I was scared of.  I guess I was scared that I wouldn’t fit in.  So many support groups are for specific diseases, and I don’t have rheumatoid arthritis or lupus or multiple sclerosis.  What I have is similar, but not the same, and it doesn’t have a name, so I figured I wouldn’t be welcome at those meetings.

Earlier this week a friend forwarded me an email about a chronic pain support group just one town over.  The regular meetings are in the library, but this one was at an assisted living facility.  I pictured myself seated with 70- and 80-somethings who would think I didn’t belong.  And anyway, pain isn’t my worst symptom, so why bother?  I made excuses and had doubts up until the minute I arrived, but I pushed myself and went.  What I found was a group of warm, supportive people.  The guest speaker, a RN specializing in chronic pain management, was fantastic.  He clearly understood.  There was a teenage girl and a couple of elderly people, but most were in their 40s, 50s, and 60s.  Sure I was one of the youngest, but no one cared.  They welcomed me immediately as one of them.

I hope to keep going, even though they meet on Friday mornings.  I hope that when I go back to work in a few months it will be part time, and I’ll try to get Friday mornings off.  I can’t believe it, but I want to go back!

For a long time I didn’t understand the point of support groups.  I didn’t want to be around a bunch of people whining about their symptoms (that’s not what this was.)  I didn’t see how they could help, since they couldn’t get rid of the pain.  Now I understand.  The group won’t get rid of the pain, but it might help me find ways to reduce the pain.  And reducing the pain would give me more energy to deal with my more pressing symptoms.

But the biggest benefit of the group, the one I should have predicted from the start but never did, is the community.  For once, I was in a room of people who understood what I was going through, and I didn’t have to explain it to a single person.  I didn’t have to say a word.  Now that’s support.

 

If any of this sounds familiar, if you can relate, please share it on Facebook and/or Twitter so others know it’s not just them, that they’re not alone.

Leave a Comment » | Educating, Expectations, Kindness, Pain, Raves, Support, Symptoms | Permalink
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