Smile and ignore it

July 3, 2013

My finger hurts. It’s swollen and painful and there’s nothing I can do about it. This is new. I’ve never had anything like this before. There’s no sign of a bite or sting, so it’s probably my immune system acting up, even though it’s just this one finger. It hurts to use it in any way. I’m having trouble with activities from typing to wiping my own ass. So what can I do?

Smile and ignore it, that’s what I can do. I spoke to my doc. I’ll take some extra Vitamin D. I’ll ice it. I’ll take some arnica. But there’s really nothing else I can do, so I’ll just smile and ignore it and move on with my day. It sucks, but so be it. I’ve suffered worse before, and I’m sure I will again.

And since typing is incredibly painful, I’ll make this a short post. Time to smile, ignore it, and read a book. I’m just glad this is one that can be ignored (sort of.)

7 Comments | Frustration, Pain, Rants, Symptoms, Unpredictable | Permalink
Posted by chronicrants

Lessons in limitations

July 1, 2013

I’ve been trying to convince myself that, if need be, I could do some part time work. It wouldn’t be much, but maybe a few hours every day. It would be something I could do from home, something computer-based. And then I got a reality check.

The other day I started a new blog. I’d been thinking about it for a while and I finally took the leap. This blog is about 2 years old and I’d forgotten just how long it took to set this up. Also, I was in much better health when I set this up. Hell, I was even working full time!

I set aside lot of time and I got to work. I signed up a domain name, and got the basic site set up. I created an email account to use for the work associated with the site. I signed up for a Twitter account related to the blog. Every time I signed up for something new, I had to confirm it through email. I had to make sure it all connected. I spent some time finding just the right look for the blog. I chose an avatar to associate with the blog account, the email account, and the Twitter account. I wrote the “About” page. I really wanted to write my first post, but I just didn’t have the energy.

In the end, I spent more than 3 hours working on my new blog. I got it all set up and ready for my first post. Well, it was mostly ready. There are some security things I still need to do and some other small items to take care of. But it’s mostly done. And by the time I got to that point, after 3 hours of work on the computer, I was mentally and physically exhausted. I was worn out. I was in pain. I’d had it. All I wanted to do was lie down. My eyes hurt, so I figured it would be good to read a book for a bit. I only read 2 pages. I was too tired to read.

So I learned a lesson. As much as I want to think otherwise, I’m not ready for a job, even a part time one. Sure, I spend lots of time on the computer now, but it’s broken up into small bits and it’s mostly reading. Being more actively engaged and sitting for so long was just too much. I’m not ready.

I just wish the insurance company and social security would read this.

3 Comments | Expectations, Fatigue, Frustration, Job, Limitations, Pain, Rants, Symptoms | Permalink
Posted by chronicrants

The little things really DO make a BIG difference

June 29, 2013

It’s amazing how a small thing change make a huge difference. I was just getting mentally ready to go to a friend’s house. Pills in purse? Yes. Food? Need to bring some. Clothing? Better make sure it’s all loose today. Cooling towel? Cool enough to work for the car ride. The routine is familiar, but annoying.

And then I got a text from my friend: “What room temperature is best for you?”

WOW! We hadn’t discussed that. I knew he had a/c, and I’d mentioned that I’d need him to turn it on, but that was it. But he remembered how sensitive I am to heat. He knows that often I don’t meet up with him for lunch because I can’t stand the humidity. I know he and his wife don’t love the heat, but unlike me they can certainly deal with it. And he thought to ask what temperature I want his a/c set to. He’s going to change the temperature of their apartment for me.

Now that’s a thoughtful friend!

2 Comments | Expectations, Kindness, Limitations, Raves, Support, Symptoms, Thoughtfulness | Permalink
Posted by chronicrants

The trouble with sleeping late

June 29, 2013

I had another bout of annoying insomnia last night. This just started in the past year and it’s baffling. I wake up around 4am for no reason that I can figure out, then I just stay awake for a couple of hours before getting back to sleep. Then I wake up around the normal time, just deprived of sleep. It makes no sense to me.

Last night was different, though. After 2.5 hours of lying there awake, I finally drifted back off to sleep. But instead of waking up around 9 or 10 am, I slept until 10:42! I would have probably gone back to sleep, but seeing those numbers on the clock forced me to wake up. My pill schedule was all messed up! And of course it’s a Saturday, so I couldn’t ask my naturopath for advice.

First things first, I took my thyroid pill. That always happens as soon as I wake up. But then, 1/2 hour later, should I take my regular dose of Isocort? It’s an adrenal supplement, and the whole point is to take it at certain times of day based on my adrenal function at those times. My cortisol is low in the mornings, so I usually take it when I wake up (1/2 hour after the thyroid pill to avoid conflicts.) But should I take it at 11:15? That was too late! I compromised and took a half dose. I didn’t think it would be a good idea to skip it completely.

I had to wait a bit longer to eat, so breakfast was going to be around 11:30. Maybe I should just make that lunch. But wait, I have pills that I have to take with food 3 times a day! Ok, so I had a really small breakfast and took my breakfast pills, and I’ll have lunch around 2pm.

But wait! Lunch at 2pm means I can’t take my next round of adrenal supplements until 3pm and that’s too late! I’m supposed to take them around 2pm, but I have to wait an hour after eating before I take them. So ok, maybe I’ll move lunch to 1:30 and take the pills at 2:30. That’s not too bad.

And the fiber I’m supposed to take 2 hours after the breakfast pills and at least 1/2 hour before the lunch pills? Well, too bad. I’ll just have to take it closer to the other pills and so be it.

Before all the pills, if I slept late that just meant I started my day late. When did it become so damn complicated?

2 Comments | Decisions, Frustration, Limitations, Medication, Rants, Symptoms, Unpredictable | Permalink
Posted by chronicrants

« Previous Entries
Next Entries »