Chronic Rants

That title sounds whiny, but I don’t mean it that way. It’s just a fact. When you have chronic pain and chronic fatigue, taking out the trash can be damn hard. I thought about that last night as I returned from taking out the trash.

Usually it starts when I smell the trash. I have a lousy sense of smell, so if I’m noticing something, then it’s probably already really bad. This is the point when I’d take it out if I was healthy. If I don’t feel up to it, which I usually don’t, then I wait. The next day the trash is smelling a lot worse. I light a scented candle and throw open the windows. I tell myself I’ll take the trash out with me when I go out for something, but of course when I finally go out, I want to save my energy for the outing. So the trash has to wait. Finally the smell is so bad that I force myself to do it.

Getting the trash out of the trash can is tough. I pull at those handles and sometimes I have to stop and rest if the bag gets caught on the can. I carry the trash to my door, put on my shoes, grab my keys, and carry it all the way down the hallway. The trash is usually too heavy and awkward for me to try the stairs, so I wait for the elevator. Once in the basement, I have to lift the trash high to get it into the large bin. Then I take the elevator back upstairs, walk back down the hall, and enter my apartment with a sigh of relief. Putting a clean bag in the bin can wait.

I suppose I could take the trash out more often. That would help, because it would make the trash lighter. But it would also be worse, because it would mean more frequent trips down to the basement. There’s no good answer, of course. When you live alone, you have to take out the trash. I’m just lucky I don’t have to take it outside, especially in bad weather. Still, it’s a long haul down to the basement.

In general I try not to let the little things get to me, but sometimes I get so frustrated at not being able to do small things that other people take for granted. Even worse, people complain about not wanting to do things that I wish I could do! Taking out the trash isn’t glamorous, but it’s a lot better than having a stinking apartment for 3 days. I’m just glad I can still manage to do it, even if it’s really damn hard.

This entry was posted on Friday, August 16th, 2013 at 5:48 pm and is filed under Fatigue, Frustration, Isolation, Limitations, Pain, Rants, Symptoms. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.