Get your hands off my healthcare: men and birth control

February 16, 2012

Is healthcare a privilege or a right?

I believe that it is a right.  Some politicians disagree.  It is infuriating, but they have more control over the treatments I receive than I do!

This isn’t a problem unique to the U.S., of course.  I’ve been following the twitter rants from U.K. posters, and it looks bad there too.  And let’s not even get started on countries where women are treated like property.  I may cover those another night, but right now, I am thinking about U.S. healthcare (there’s an oxymoron), and who wouldn’t, with what’s happening right now?

The short version is that the president decided to follow the recommendations of a study, and make all contraceptive care free to women. In the U.S., health insurance is generally provided by employers (the unemployed and self-employed have options, but they’re usually lousy.)  So it was decided that all employers, except for churches, would have to pay for contraceptive coverage.  I don’t like the church exemption, but so be it.

The Catholic clergy went nuts.  They didn’t want their religiously affiliated hospitals, universities, etc. to be required to pay for birth control.  The solution?  The president arranged it so that any religiously affiliated organization with a moral objection could opt out, and the insurance companies would be required to provide coverage free of charge.  This works out for everyone, since it still saves the insurance company a lot of money in the long run.

The clergy weren’t happy.  Instead of uniting together to preach the sins of contraception to their parishioners, they decided to unite together against the idea that contraception would be provided to their employees.  Instead of trying to convince people they are right, they are trying to bully women.

And just to add insult to injury, the panel of religious leaders that was gathered consisted of only men.

Twitter has been aflutter, Facebook has been indignant, and I just want to wake up from this nightmare.  The best suggestion I’ve seen so far was on Twitter: That there should be a congressional hearing, made of only female legislators, on insurance coverage of Viagra.  [I apologize to the author that I didn’t note their name.  I would love to give credit to the right person for this wonderful suggestion.]

Now personally I think the real answer is simple:

Make men financially responsible for the fetuses and babies that they father.  (Sperm donors could be excused.)

Let’s say there was a law that the man (whether a one-night stand or something more long term) whose sperm impregnated a woman through intercourse (a simple paternity test would ensure accuracy) would have to pay 50% of her abortion costs or pregnancy costs; 50% of medical costs for both mother and fetus/child; 50% of clothing, food, school supplies, recreational activities, tutoring, and other childhood costs.  Now, with this law in place, would our politicians be having this inane debate?

And let’s leave aside for a minute the idea that contraception is immoral.  Let’s say you believe this.  And let’s ignore the slippery slope this would create (what else could employers object to on moral grounds?  The most expensive parts of coverage?)  What about the many, many women who take birth control pills for other reasons?  Personally, my estrogen levels are too low, so I take 1/2 pill every day to raise those levels.  This does not serve as birth control one bit.  Why shouldn’t this be covered like any other medication?  And what about my friend who had a very dangerous birthing experience with her son?  Her doctors say that she shouldn’t get pregnant again, that it’s too dangerous.  Is it worse for her to use birth control than to possibly get pregnant and need an abortion?  According to these men it is.  But then, that makes sense: a woman’s life just isn’t as important as a man’s, apparently.

Why are we debating the healthcare that men think women should receive?  A small group of religious leaders think that birth control of any type is immoral.  A bunch of politicians want to do anything that makes the president look bad, and since they represent some religious constituents, this suits their purposes just fine.  And the voters?  I just hope the voters make it clear that this is not ok.  Our medical treatment is not up for debate.  Our family planning is not up for debate.

My big regret today?  That I can not tell those jerks what I really think of them in person.

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The double standard of pursuing treatments

February 9, 2012

But they must have some idea how to treat you!?

I’m so sick of hearing that, but somehow I found those words coming out of my mouth today.  I hate when people say that to me.  I’ve accepted that there’s no straightforward treatment for my CIs, that the best we can do is slow things down.  I’ll never be “healthy.”  I can handle that.

But I hold my friends’ health to a different standard.  Sure, the doctors can’t cure me, but they must be able to cure everyone else!  Besides, my friend has a diagnosis.  They know what’s wrong with her!  Why can’t they fix it?!?

I get very protective over my friends.  She knows this.  And she’s known me for ages, since years before I had any symptoms.  So when I made that comment, we both just broke out laughing.  Imagine, Ms. R of all people suggesting that there must always be a cure!

It’s a double standard of sorts, but one that I’m fiercely protecting; I want my friends to be cured.  All of them.  Even if I never get better, that doesn’t mean they won’t either.  I want them to keep fighting for results.  And I’ll be there to support them the whole way.  I just hope they don’t give up.

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The best kind of pain

February 7, 2012

***Warning: I get a bit sappy when I talk about my friends’ kids.  But hey, that’s an auntie’s prerogative, right?

When I was a kid, every winter my family would go cross country skiing once or twice.  We built snowmen and went sledding throughout the long New England winter, but because we went skiing so rarely, it was a real treat.

Every trip was different, but they all had the same excitement: the drive out there, getting fitted for skis and poles and boots, relearning everything we’d forgotten since the last time, breaking in the middle for hot chocolate, falling over in the snow.  It was a magical time.

Until the next morning.

Going only once or twice each winter meant that my skiing muscles never got built up.  Every morning after a ski trip, I’d wake up sore as hell, and all day long it would only get worse.  The first time it happened, I thought something was wrong with me.  After that, I knew what it was, but it was still a tough couple of days.

The other day I woke up with that same feeling.  It was glorious.

A close friend had a baby recently and I drove across the state to visit them.  Before this I knew that the Plaquenil I started last summer
was working, but only because I could climb up more stairs before my knees gave out.  This day really proved it.  First, I held the baby.  A lot.  Much longer than I could with her first two kids.  There’s nothing like holding a sleeping newborn; they’re so incredibly peaceful.  My wrists and hands were sore afterwards, but I could tell the pain wouldn’t last long (thankfully I was right about that.)  Then I was playing with the older kids on the floor, and before I knew it, they were both climbing on my back at the same time!  I never thought I’d be able to do something like that!  It was fantastic.  I’ve always enjoyed being fun auntie Rants, but it was in a calmer way – coloring and building blocks and shaping clay and reading.  This was the first time in their lives that we’d been able to roughhouse together.  Did I mention it was fantastic?  Sure, I said no to them when one wanted to sit on my back and have me crawl around; I know my limits.  But having them climb on me while I wiggled around on the floor (on purpose – they loved it) was really…. am I overusing “fantastic” yet?  And what amazed me was that I really didn’t feel any pain.

Until the next morning.

Actually, though, I wasn’t really in pain the next morning, just sore.  Very sore.  Muscles hurt that I didn’t know I had.  After all, I had barely used them in many years, so I really couldn’t blame them for acting out at me.  It was a rough day, and the next day was even worse.  And I loved it!  I’d do it again in an instant.  Playing with the kids was a dream come true, but the soreness was good too.  Have you ever gone to the gym, done some great new exercise, then ached the next day?  You know how good it feels to know you’re building up your muscles?  That’s what this was!  Only I never thought I’d ever be able to work these muscles again.  I thought that for the rest of my life, they’d remain barely used.

Ok, this isn’t perfect.  My energy still sucks and I felt exhausted for days after that trip.  But this shows there’s hope.  For more than nine years, I was in pain all the time.  I mean all the time.  24/7.  It got to the point where I couldn’t remember what it felt like to not be in pain.  Now I have pain every day, but only for parts of the day, and to me, that’s magical.  It gives me hope that my energy could rebound too.

And yes, I’m realistic.  One day the pain will get worse in all the places where it’s now a bit better.  That could be in a year, or 10 years, or 50 years (longevity runs in my family, even with the autoimmune crap), but I’m sure it’ll return.  For now, I’m just living it up.  And for me, that means getting on the floor and letting adorable kids climb all over me.  And if I’m sore the next day, remembering their laughter makes it all worth it.  It’s the best pain I’ve ever felt.

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Komen vs. PP: Let’s focus on what matters

February 2, 2012

My personal life is so overwhelming right now that I can’t even write anything personal.  Maybe that’ll resume in a day or two, but for now, there’s always politics.

If you’ve paid any attention to the news recently, or to health-related Twitter feeds, you must know about the big Susan G. Komen for the Cure debacle.  In a nutshell, it’s pulled funding from Planned Parenthood.  A Komen board member said that this was due to concern over a Republican congressperson’s investigation of Planned Parenthood.  We all know that the Republican party has said that public funds to Planned Parenthood should be pulled because Planned Parenthood provides abortions.  The abortions are a tiny tiny part of what Planned Parenthood does.  They are not paid for with public funds.  They are legal.  They in no way hinder the breast cancer screenings that the organization provides.  I assume those screenings are the reason Komen gave them money to begin with.  So what’s going on?

Having worked in nonprofits for many years, I believe that most people do not do sufficient research before donating to an organization.  There are many sites that can help you research a nonprofit (http://www2.guidestar.org/ and http://www.irs.gov/charities/article/0,,id=249767,00.html are two of them) and they are generally underused.  Still, where should someone go to find out if funds will be withheld because of “moral” views or “political pressure”?  I wish I knew.

I want cures for the illnesses I suffer from.  I want cures for the diseases my loved ones suffer from.  I do not want political games to slow down or stop research on or prevention of those illnesses.  

Planned Parenthood helps women detect breast cancer (and other forms of cancer, as well as other problems) early, so that they can receive immediate treatment.  I  happen to have very strong views on abortion, but those are irrelevant here.  If the funds that Komen provides are used only for breast cancer screenings (and Komen can mostly likely make that a requirement of the funding) then why on earth should the funds be withdrawn?

Interestingly, this has made people (including non-media people) more interested in Komen’s practices, and they are noticing where their money goes (what percentage to fundraising, what percentage to research, etc.)  Like I said, I believe that everyone should do this kind of research before contributing to nonprofits.  So maybe something good has come of all of this.

Still, I simply do not understand why an organization that does so much good must constantly defend itself, simply because a small part of what it does is provide legal, safe procedures for women who need them.  For everyone looking to stop funding to Planned Parenthood I must ask: are you planning to fund checkups, cancer screenings, counseling, and everything else they do yourself?  No?  Then back off.

Let’s focus on what really matters.  Let’s focus on prevention and cures.

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