Surprise! Your social security application is due NOW!

September 7, 2012

About 10 years ago I bought my first new car.  I negotiated a good price, got them to throw in extras like an extended warranty, and then moved on to the contract, where I proceeded, to the saleman’s chagrin, to read every single word.  It took a ridiculously long time, but I wanted to make sure I read it all.  I caught something important, actually, and had them change it.  I think it’s very important to read every word of these long, annoying contracts.  And I think the same is true of important applications, like for social security.

That’s why I’m certain that no mention was made of the deadline for the second part of the application when I was filling out the first part.  I would have read it.  And it would have stuck with me.  You see, the way it works is that first you fill out the main application.  Then you fill out the disability application.  Then, if you want, you fill out an application for SSI.  I read several times that my SSI application date was being set based on when I started that first application (and they only tell you that after you start!) but I saw no mention of the disability application, so I logically assumed I could just do it whenever I wanted.  Obviously I knew it had to be done somewhat soon so that they could start processing my application, but a few days here or there wouldn’t matter, right?

Obviously, I didn’t learn my lesson from the MassHealth paperwork procrastination.  I put off that first part of the social security application for a couple of weeks, but after that I did have to legitimately wait for my lawyer to get back to me with answers to my questions.  Then on Tuesday night, with a big sigh of relief, I submitted the first application online.  On Wednesday I drove over to the local social security office with my W2 and signed medical release form.  I felt good about this!  Then Thursday I was busy and today, well, I meant to work on that application.  Really, I did.  But, well, it would still be waiting for me tomorrow, right?  Or Sunday, definitely by Sunday.

Yeah, I know, I was procrastinating, but it was only a couple of days.  Then I checked my mail today and there was a letter from the Social Security Administration.  It said that I had 10 days (from the day I applied – which was already 2 days ago!) to submit a whole bunch of things, including this additional application!  I was horrified.  If they had said upfront that 10 days after the first application I’d have to have the second one in, I would have finished them both before hitting that “submit” button.  I could have prepared.  I would have done it all differently.  But of course they didn’t offer any information like that.  No, that would have been too helpful.

I read all sorts of checklists, but it wasn’t mentioned there.  I read the introductions to the forms and all sorts of boring information about the materials I’d need, but it wasn’t mentioned there either.  Now I’m really worried!  I started working on the application today, and I emailed more questions to my lawyer.  If I need to fill in certain info then I’m screwed, because it will take time to get my older medical records, and that’s time that I just don’t have.  And what’s this about wanting my short term disability pay stubs?  What pay stubs?  It was direct deposit, and really, shouldn’t the insurance company be reporting that directly to the federal government anyway?  Can’t the SSA see the IRS’ files?

Of course, I got this letter after 5pm on a Friday, so now I have to wait all weekend.  First thing Monday, though, I’ll be calling the SSA.  This time, there won’t be any procrastination.  I can’t afford to take that chance!


Please don’t ask me how I am

September 6, 2012

“How are you?”

“What’s new?”

“How’s the insurance situation?”

“What’s happening with your treatments?”

“Do they expect you to improve?”

I know these questions come from a place of love, but for heaven’s sake, STOP ASKING ME ALREADY!  The problem, of course, is that I have so many great people in my life who care.  I am grateful for that, really I am, but I wish they’d care a bit less verbally!

Every time I speak to someone who I haven’t spoken with in a while (and every time I see my grandparents, who are always anxious for news and forget that we just spoke about it 3 days ago) I get asked some version of these questions.  This can translate to no questions for several days, or having this conversation 5 times in 1 day!

One of the challenges of having crappy health is keeping a healthy perspective.  I know you know what I mean.  Since I am unable to work, I don’t have a job to distract me.  Since I am not able to go out much, I don’t have other “news” to discuss.  Since I’m not able to date, I can’t distract my friends with tales of lurid sex (but maybe I should just make some up?)  This leaves me with a lot of free time to dwell on all the shittiness in my life…. or not.  I opt for not.  I try hard to keep some balance.  I read books and blogs and other useful sources to learn as much as I can about my various health conditions and the possible treatments for them.  Then I pursue those treatments.  I read books and blogs on personal finance and on various personal development topics so that if (when?) I get better, I will have a life that I truly enjoy.  I read novels and watch tv as an escape to a fantasy world.  I spend as much time as I can with family and friends, even if some of that time can only be spent by phone or email.  I spend time thinking about my situation in terms of my various options (or lack thereof) and how I might handle each scenario.  So basically, I try to avoid woe-is-me thinking as much as I can.  Sure, I have my off days – who doesn’t?  But I try to limit them and to focus on other areas of my life.

And it works.  It works really well.  Until a friend asks what my current health status is, and if I think I’ll improve, and what the doctor says, and what I’ll do without health insurance (as of this weekend!!!) and where my LTD appeal stands and and and and and…..  It drags me back into the mess that is my life, and it makes me dwell on the lousy parts and re-realize how uncertain the possible improvements really are.

So I’m done.  That’s it.  No more.  From now on, I will not answer these questions (with exceptions made for my parents and grandparents, who are all awesome and supportive and wouldn’t put up with this ban even if I tried!)  I am going to write up answers to the standard questions, make a personal FAQ, and simply email everyone who wants to know.  And if they don’t like it?  Too bad.  If they really care, they’ll understand that this is what’s best for my sanity, that their questions force me to dwell on the negative when I am trying so hard not to do that.  I will try to explain, and then I won’t answer their questions.  That’s it.  Fini.  End.


Holes in the so-called safety nets

August 28, 2012

There’s this idea that the so-called social safety nets are just hanging out, waiting for us to jump into them whenever we feel like it.  To listen to the politicians speak, these safety nets are easily gotten, easily abused, taken for granted, and a huge waste of money.  If you don’t live in the U.S. and/or don’t know what I’m talking about, check out the links for explanations.

I can’t speak about every type of “safety net” because I haven’t tried them all.  And I can’t speak to all of the politicians’ points.  But I can definitely say that these services are not so easy to get!

In this fight for services, I have a lot going for me: I’m intelligent, I am well educated, I have unlimited internet access and my own private computer, I am well organized, and I used to deal with red tape and bureaucracy on a regular basis at a previous job.  So even while other people struggle, this should be really easy for me, right?  Yeah, right.

A couple weeks ago I made it very clear how I feel about Medicaid.  And I was thankful that at least in my state, I’m eligible to apply for Medicaid, called MassHealth here.  Of course, there’s a downside: I followed all the rules and it’s still not working out well.  When my former employer’s benefits office told me I was losing my health insurance in just two short months, they told me that it would take 3 weeks for my MassHealth application to be processed, so I should wait to apply.  If I applied too soon, my current insurance could get in the way, so I should time it to get MassHealth just as my insurance ran out.  I called MassHealth’s customer service line several times and spoke to three separate people.  Each person told me the application would take 3 weeks to process.  The automated system said that the current processing time is 15 business days.  Ok, so it’s 3 weeks; that’s not so bad.  But it turns out, it’s 3 weeks to process the initial application!  After that application, it takes 90 days to process the supplemental disability application!  The supplemental disability application states that this time can be speeded up by including medical records, so I included all of mine back to January 2011, even though they really only needed the 12 months..  Today I spoke to the office that handles those applications.  It was explained that they are still required to contact my doctors and to give them 30 days to respond with my medical records.  Yes, these will just be duplicates of the records that I already provided.  So what was the point of including those records?  None.  I did not save time, I just spent more on postage and wasted paper.  Fantastic.  So now I will have a 2-month gap between when my insurance ends and when I could even potentially be approved for MassHealth.  Of course, they could still deny my application.  And what am I supposed to do in the meantime?  Well, I can stop seeing doctors and taking medications, but that’s not entirely an option.  There’s one medication that I can’t stop without doing serious harm, and another that would do moderate harm.  I can either pay for these out of pocket myself, or I can spend $550 per month for COBRA.  Great options.  But I guess it’s my own fault – I followed the rules.

Services like housing vouchers and food stamps are shrouded in mystery.  Even though these are state and federal programs, they are handled at local levels.  It takes a few phone calls to find the right office.  This office will not provide information by phone and there’s nothing helpful online.  They do not make appointments.  They simply say that I should show up with my paperwork, then they’ll tell me which services I’m eligible for.  I don’t even know which services they handle!  So the only way to find out what I might be eligible for is to show up at this office, but of course showing up can be hard for people with health problems.  And I’m slowly learning about others offices that might be able to help with this kind of thing, but only by asking for advice from other people who have gone through this process.  As far as I can tell, there is no one central calling center or web site to provide information on what services exist for people with no income and an inability to work due to health problems.

And then there’s Social Security Disability.  Should I even discuss this?  I’ve found different statistics for how many people are denied the first time they apply, but the lowest number I found is 50%.  If these numbers are right, that means that more than half, possibly much more than half, of applicants are denied the first time they apply.  And quite a few are denied on appeal, too.  The application is long and arduous.  It feels nothing like a safety net and everything like a test.  Filling out the application is a test, waiting to hear back is a test, going through the appeals process is a test.  And if you pass?  You get enough money each month to pay your rent.  Maybe.  If you’re lucky.  Of course, there won’t be much money left over for frivolous things like food, but that’s what food stamps are for… if you can figure out how to apply for them.


Remembering spontaneity

August 27, 2012

A friend called me up the other day and asked if I wanted to hang out.  He meant right away.  I didn’t hear my phone ring and by the time I got the message it was too late, but it really made me wonder: when did I lose all of the spontaneity in my life?

I remember a time not too long ago when I would find myself without plans on a Saturday, so I’d pick up the phone and call a few
friends to see who was around.  I remember a time when I’d decide at a moment’s notice to go away overnight.  It got to the point that I’d pack a bag and be out the door within 30 minutes.  Then I started keeping a toiletry bag always packed with spares of everything, so I could leave even faster.  A last-minute date?  A random outing with friends?  A local getaway?  Yes, please!

Now everything has to be thought through.  Do I have enough energy?  Do I need to save some spoons for tomorrow?  (If you don’t know what these spoons are, definitely click the link.)  What will I eat that satisfies the diet?  Can I tolerate the heat?  How much walking will there be?  Will it cause more pain?

These are all completely reasonable, understandable questions.  They make perfect sense.  And they’ve killed my sense of spontaneity.

I’m not suggesting that I have to be spontaneous every day, but it would be nice to occasionally do something that wasn’t completely planned out in advance.  I want to not know what I’m doing tomorrow (and not knowing if I’ll be watching tv versus reading emails doesn’t count!)  I can’t travel and that’s fine (well, it’s not fine, but I have no choice right now) but that doesn’t mean I can’t do something at the last minute closer to home.

I’m not ready to instigate something spontaneous.  I know that.  But I think there’s a glimmer of hope.  When I got my friend’s message my first reaction was that of course I couldn’t do something without notice!  But then I thought about it, and realized that, actually, I could, and I’d probably have a wonderful time.  When I looked at the clock, I realized I’d missed my chance (he only had a short time free,) but just remembering what it was like to make a spur-of-the-moment plan was fantastic.  Now I have to make sure I actually do that.  Soon.