I wish I was wrong yesterday, but I wasn’t. Today sucked, and still sucks. Waking up early for an unpleasant medical appointment is never fun. Coming home late isn’t so great either. Working at a boring, mindless job in the middle makes it all worse, especially when the boring, mindless job involves a lot of computer work, which only makes the pain worse. The bright spot was that the pharmacy was really quick in filling the prescription that I don’t want to have to take. And the boring, mindless job has good health insurance benefits, so I guess that’s a positive. But no, I feel like crap, so I prefer to stay in a lousy mood for a bit longer. Tomorrow I’ll be back to my happy, cheerful self. Well, more or less. Now, I’m just hoping to stay awake long enough to do some dishes and then go to bed at a reasonable hour. Going to bed too early and throwing off the already-precarious sleep schedule will definitely not help things. Ok, must stay awake, must stay awake, must stay awake……
Being right is over-rated
July 28, 2011
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Posted by chronicrants
The counter-productiveness of self-preservation
July 27, 2011I need a job. Well, I need an income, but I don’t have a trust fund or a wealthy spouse, so I guess I need a job. The more I work, the worse I feel, so I’m looking for ways to cut back my hours. In the meantime, I have a basic 9-5.
I also need doctors. Like it or not, I need them. This week, I need them to help me find a new long-term treatment. This is not a pleasant prospect.
So on top of having a lousy appointment to discuss long-term treatments which will no doubt have horrible side affects, I also have to wake up an hour early for the appointment, which will make me feel horrible all day, and then I have to work an hour late to make up for coming in late due to the appointment. It’s going to be one long-ass day.
And that’s what happens when I try to take care of myself by balancing a job and my health. Yikes.
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Medications vs. Symptoms: Can there be a winner?
July 26, 2011I’ve noticed that so-called “healthy” people often think of medications as cure-alls. Have an ear infection? Take some antibiotics and viola! All better! Gee, that was so easy. But venture beyond your basic, easily-diagnosed, known-cure issues, and it gets more complicated. Constantly queasy? Take this and you’ll just be constipated instead. Trouble breathing? Just use an inhaler. Oh, but watch out for the jitters. Auto-immune issues? Would you prefer the drug that will make you permanently infertile, or should we just skip that and go right to chemo? Oh yeah, these are real fun decisions to make.
The thing is, in the big battle between the side effects of meds and the symptoms of illness, there’s no winner. When the symptoms are worse than the side effects, it’s time to take the meds, but that doesn’t make it fun and it certainly doesn’t make it easy. Every day (or week or whatever) you choose to take a pill or get a shot or otherwise receive something that you know will make you feel horrible. But hey, it’s not as bad as what it’s preventing, so that makes it ok, right? Well, maybe not. At the moment, we work with the options we’ve got. Still, that doesn’t mean I like the options.
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For no reason at all
July 25, 2011It’s amazing how suddenly symptoms can pop up. There you are, just minding your own business, and they hit you. Or at least, they hit me. There I was, working on the computer today, minding my own business, when I felt the pain. It was sudden and severe. Now, since I was working on the computer, you’d think it would be in my back, my neck, my fingers, my wrists, my shoulders. Nope, it was none of those. That would make too much sense. There I was, typing away, and I felt this horrible pain in my *toes*! And it gets worse. I was sitting cross-legged (yeah, yeah, it’s horrible for my posture, so sue me) and it was the foot that was off the ground that had the pain. There it was, mid-air, and the pain attacked. What’s up with that? Ok, these things are unpredictable, I get that. But are you kidding me? Pain in my foot while it’s just hanging out? That’s just so wrong. If the pain’s going to hit, it should at least make a tiny bit of sense. I know that’s asking too much, but sometimes I just fall back to wishful thinking.
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Chronic Rants 