It’s October in New England, but you wouldn’t know it if you didn’t look at a calendar.
Every summer I count down until the third weekend in September. That’s when I know the weather will have finally shifted for good, and I’ll be feeling less pain, less fatigue, and less nausea. It’s truly a magical time.
But not this year.
This year we had cooler weather in August, and I was grateful for that, but I also knew it wouldn’t last. September was up and down. But surely October would be my time, right? Not so much.
When you have chronic illness, nothing is simple, and the unpredictable symptoms, flares, and other issues can make life hard to plan. Still, we do our best. For me, that means making more plans in the fall and winter, when I know I will feel better.
That’s why, even though a “simple” weekend away with my best girlfriends is incredibly hard, I felt I could do it if it was in the fall. My friends are understanding, and were perfectly happy to avoid planning anything in September, just in case. They get it. Every time we’ve had cooler, less humid weather, I get text messages and emails from friends saying, “This is your kind of weather! I hope you’re feeling up to enjoy it.” And I love that they understand.
So we planned for “safe” October. Who could have known? This isn’t our typical cool, crisp, wonderful New England autumn.
Thankfully the temperatures are cool enough, though way too warm for this time of year (upper 70s?!? Are you fucking kidding me?!?) My problem is the dew point. It’s supposed to get close to 70 this weekend! Even healthy people find that uncomfortable and for me, it will be near torture. But what can I do? The house we rented doesn’t have air conditioning – after all, none of us thought we’d need it. Higher on our list was finding a house with a working fire place. Last year we did this trip later in October and it snowed. We had a lovely time sitting by a roaring fire, and wanted to repeat that experience. If only.
I am in pain already, and it’s only beginning. Well yes, I’m always in pain, but this is worse, and I know it’s from the weather. My toes are swollen and painful. My knee is swollen and so painful that it’s hard to walk. My neck hurts. Everything is just wrong.
But I won’t stay home. I have been looking forward to this trip for a year. It is my one chance to do this. I will NOT give it up!
I will bring the medications that I can. I will be careful how I eat. And I will block out a lot of extra recovery time when I return. Still, I know this is going to be really rough. I will be in pain, nauseated, and fatigued. Thankfully, I will be surrounding by wonderful women, women I have known most of my life, the only non-relatives who knew me before any of my symptoms began, women who have always been supportive. And maybe most importantly, women who have always made me laugh, even at the worst of times.
So wish me luck. Because I want to be able to enjoy this weekend as much as possible. If only Mother Nature would cooperate.
Chronic Rants 
Oh my goodness, I lived in New England most of my younger life. It use to snow on my birthday every yes, at the end of September. I do not really miss it. . I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis 16 years ago and denied it for as long as possible. I guess I decided after years it was best to try to embrace it! I decided a little more than 2 months ago to start this blog and it was the best decision ever! I have been able to communicate with people all around the world with chronic illness that understand how hard it is! I actually set myself a goal that may seem crazy to a lot of people, but I want to do one post every day for a while! It is so amazing to be able to express my feelings and help others deal with issues!! I wish you lots of luck with you blog and if I can do anything for you, do not hesitate to contact me! I look forward to reading more of your posts! Take care!
That’s great about the blog, Alyssa! I am constantly grateful that I started this one more than 6 years ago. The community has been amazing. I blogged daily for months, and then tapered off to whenever I feel like it, which tends to average about once a week. Do whatever works for you. If you want to write every day, then go for it! It’s a great way to get into the blogging habit.
Thank you! Blogging has been so helpful and the people have been amazing! What part of New England to you live in? I hope you have a great evening! Take care!
I’m in the Boston area. And yes, the people are the best part of blogging for me, too 🙂
WOW, Boston!? I was born in Holiokye MA and still have family in MA. I lived my younger days in VT and moved to NC about 18 or 19 years ago. We have NO seasons in the south!! It is so crazy. How is the weather up in MA?
How funny! The weather here is odd, even for MA. The foliage colors are dull and it’s humid out. Go figure. Maybe you can come visit and experience the seasons some time.
I loved the foliage in New England! It was always breathtaking! There is one area in North Carolina that has amazing area like that through the woods but it only last about a week! I just don’t have the heart to ever go back to MA. The last time I was there, we buried my Grandfather and nothing will ever feel right again.