Pure selfishness

August 10, 2011

This is something that bugs me a whole lot, even more than most other things, so you know it’s a lot.  I’m sure I’ll post about it again and again.  What am I talking about?  Illegally parking in handicapped parking spaces “just for a minute.”  I have encountered this more times than I can remember, and it happened again today.

What makes people think this is ok?  If they need the space for 10 minutes, that’s more important than letting a person who really needs it park there?  Today there was a passenger in the illegally-parked car, and he got a real earful.  To be honest, I explained the situation well (though a bit heatedly) and made good points.  He said his buddy was only parking for a few minutes.  I pointed out that in those few minutes, someone who needed the spot wouldn’t be able to park there.  I explained that this particular spot was for people who really needed it.  I don’t know if he got it or not, but I walked away feeling pissed off.  What makes people think that they can treat others this way? Are they so self absorbed that they don’t see what they’re doing?  Just how rude, inconsiderate, and selfish are these people?


The elusivisity of sleep

August 9, 2011

Get more sleep and avoid stress.  That was the advice of the doctor who first diagnosed me.  I thought he was nuts.  If it was so easy to get more sleep and avoid stress, wouldn’t everyone do it?

Eight years later, I’m doing much better on both counts.  It’s not like I get enough sleep every night, or avoid stress altogether, but I’m getting closer to enough sleep, and keeping my stress as minimal as possible.  It’s not easy, and I certainly slip, but overall I feel that I’m succeeding on both the sleep and stress fronts.

That’s why it’s especially infuriating when I don’t get enough sleep through no fault of my own.  What right does my body have to wake up at 5:30am on a Saturday for no reason?  That’s not fair!  After four nights of oddly vivid dreams it suddenly occurred to me that this may not be a coincidence.  I did some counting and realized this could be related to the new med.  A few minutes online proved me right: this is a common unlisted side effect.  Great.  Just great.  So now what?  When I don’t get enough sleep for several nights, my body starts to revolt.  I get pre-flu-like symptoms and feel just lousy.  If I still don’t get enough sleep, I usually get sick.  Today I started to get the pre-flu-like symptoms.  This is not a good sign, folks.  If the problem were my own schedule, I’d simply go to sleep earlier.  Instead, I fall asleep fine, then wake up feeling unrested.  This med is screwing me there’s not a damn thing I can do about it… except stop the med.  That’s not a great option.  So I’ll keep going.  With any luck, my body will adjust to the med and the elusive sleep will return.  And if I’m really lucky, the med will even do the work it’s supposed to do in the first place!

And in the meantime, I’ll continue to stumble through my days.  My mind is getting fuzzy, my body is weak, and there are big dark circles under my eyes.  But if there’s one good thing about constantly feeling lousy, it’s that I’ve learned to fake health pretty well.  When I get to work tomorrow, no one will be the wiser.  Unless this continues.  By next week, it’ll be pretty damn obvious.

Note: Yes, I know that “elusivisity” is not a real word.  If I’m going to be sleep-deprived, I might as well get to make up some fake words, right?


What world are the insurers in?

August 8, 2011

I can understand that if insurers think that a narcotic is dangerous, they won’t want to cover a 6-month supply for someone up front.  I get that.  Really.  But for a relatively harmless drug, which has no black market value whatsoever, what is the purpose in preventing early refills?  I’m not talking about filling it twice in a week, but something reasonable, like 22 days into the month.  Sometimes, it’s hard to predict when I’ll feel up to getting to the store.  Or I’ll be out of town.  Or it’s just too inconvenient to be constantly going to the drugstore.  Yes, there’s an option to get a 3-month supply, but only by mail order and only for certain drugs.  This is great if the drug is covered and the dose never changes.  For everything else, what’s the problem with letting me get a refill 22 days into the month instead of 29?  Are you really so worried that I’ll sell my birth control pills or thyroid drugs for some extra cash?  You think they’re good for getting high?  What possible reason could there be?!?


Playing political hot potato

August 7, 2011

I read an interesting article today about the Republican presidential candidates’ views on embryonic stem cell research.  Actually, the article was about whether or not each would support funding for this research.  If you are unfamiliar with embryonic stem cells, here is information from the NIH.  This is a topic I have followed for many years, and I certainly have opinions on it.  I am expressing my own opinions here and no one else’s.  This is very controversial topic and I do not intend to offend anyone.  This is simply how I feel.  I will also state that embryonic stem cell research is very unlikely to help my conditions.  That makes it no less important of an issue to me.

First, let’s remember that we don’t know what these stem cell lines may or may not be able to cure.  That said, I think that if you’ve never had a serious illness, you are certainly entitled to your opinion, but you must also admit that you do not understand the emotional reaction that those will CIs will have.  I simply ask that you do not pretend that you understand.

Next, I do not think that religious views should be a part of this discussion in any way.  Many people use references to a bible or a higher being in these discussions.  However, if someone can impose their religious views on me, then I should be able to impose my religious views on them, and things get messy.  We are not a Christian nation, a Jewish nation, an atheist nation, a Buddhist nation, an Islamic nation, or a nation that is any other way devoted to a single religion.  Therefore, religion is not a part of this issue.

If I was given the choice of saving one baby from death or saving one million other people from death, I’d choose the one million.  If I was given the choice of killing one baby or killing one million people, I would reluctantly choose the baby.  What we’re talking about is less black and white.  In fact, there are many shades of gray.  Are we talking about killing a baby to potentially cure millions?  Not quite.  Are we talking about preventing the formation of a baby in order to potentially cure millions?  That’s closer.

Of course, the real problem is that we (U.S. society) disagree on when life begins.  Does it begin when an embryo is formed?  Does it begin when a fetus is able to survive independent of the mother/surrogate?  If you believe that life begins at the moment of conception, then I can understand why embryonic stem cell research bothers you.  However, instead of fighting embryonic stem cell research, I suggest that you fight the creation of the embryos to begin with.  The embryos used for this research are created with the consent of the donors, and they will be destroyed if they are not used for this research.  If you do not believe that life begins at the moment of conception, then this argument is harder to understand; there is no reason to argue against the research.  If a collection of cells can not survive on it’s own, then is it really a life?  Yes, there are organisms that are considered living even if they can not survive on their own.  They are called parasites.  Humans, however, are not parasites, and can not survive as such.  Therefore, I personally believe that life does not begin at conception.

Now, consider that an embryo is a collection of cells.  This is scientific fact.  In the case of embryonic stem cells, this collection of cells was formed in a laboratory.  It was not formed naturally.  In general, these embryos are going to be destroyed if they are not used for this research.  If the research does not occur, then what should be done with these cells?  I have not yet seen any of the candidates, or any other politicians, propose alternatives.  Should these cells be implanted in women?  What if the donors do not want the cells to be implanted in other women?  What if other women do not what them?  If the cells are considered a life, then how can be they turned into humans, and who would care for these children once they are born?  I believe that anyone arguing against embryonic stem cell research on the grounds that a life is being destroyed must have answers to these questions.  I do not believe the answers are relevant to the discussion, but I am curious as to why no one has suggested answers yet.

Now, let’s go back to the earlier questions.  If you believe that embryonic stem cells are created by killing babies, then I can understand that it does not matter to you how many people may be helped.  There are arguments for the research which center on the number of people who could potentially be helped and I think this is a bad approach.  We do not know how many people could be helped or in what ways.  What we do know is how the research itself is being conducted.  Our tax dollars pay for many different kinds of research on the grounds that it will help us collectively.  Some research succeeds and some does not, but it must be conducted in order to find out what the results will be.  The question is not how many people could be helped, but whether or not there is an ethical objection to the manner in which the research is conducted.  I do not believe that there is.